


Routine

by Livinginfictions



Series: Tactile [1]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Cuddling, F/M, Fluff, Ninth Doctor POV, Tactile!Rose, Tenth Doctor POV, Vulnerable!Doctor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-27
Updated: 2018-04-27
Packaged: 2019-04-28 13:12:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14449980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Livinginfictions/pseuds/Livinginfictions
Summary: Rose Tyler’s hand was the first living thing the Doctor touched after his regeneration.





	1. Nine

Rose Tyler’s hand was the first living thing the Doctor touched after his regeneration, except for his Tardis. Unlike the mechanically cool, rough texture of the coral that made up his home, Rose  _ felt _ like a living thing.

At first it made the Doctor uncomfortable, ‘at first’ meaning the very first time he held her hand as he was dragging her away from living plastic dummies. He dropped her hand in the elevator like it had burned him, but almost immediately he missed it. 

He’d like to say that Rose just imprinted on him, that it was all because she was his initial contact with another being, but it was more than that.

Rose was a very touchy human. She stood right up against him and brushed their arms together, or her chest to his back. She was always grabbing his arm or leaning on him. It was intoxicating. After just a day with her, he was already doing it right back. Surely that was just the normal way that humans interacted? It was nice to feel warm, and to not be alone. He’d been alone for so long, and after the war he’d assumed there was no chance he’d even want to be touched again, he could never deserve it. 

But Rose didn’t just give it to him, she demanded it. The Doctor didn’t have time to feel guilty for holding her hand or hugging her all the time because it honestly seemed like she was the one who needed it, not him. And that made it okay. 

In the Tardis, they touched more. Rose would drape herself over his back while he was leaning over the console and watch what he worked on until she got bored, and then more often than not she would drag him with her to the library and request that he keep her company while she drew. As much as he huffed and complained, those were his favourite times. 

He would pick out a book and recline on the couch to read, and Rose would either curl up next to him and use his chest as a table for her sketchpad, or sit on the floor in front of him and rest her head on his thigh when she was thinking. It hadn’t started off that way, but Rose had gotten uncomfortable one night, which each of them on opposite sides of the couch, and she’d shifted the Doctor’s legs until they were in a position she liked and nearly climbed on top of him.

The Doctor let her, because he trusted her. Rose was far more experienced in knowing what was an appropriate touch for companions to have, and he always enjoyed being closer to her. Everything they did felt out of the ordinary, so he let her decide what was too much. Anything she did, he felt comfortable doing back, so the next time they sat down, he rearranged himself and pulled her back onto his side. There was no surprise from her, no nervousness. They mutually decided that very little was off limits, because why should they worry about what was normal in the privacy of their own home?

Even after the Doctor realized how intimate his situation with Rose was, he couldn’t find it in himself to stop it. He liked how they were, and so did Rose, if her falling asleep curled around him nearly every night was any evidence. Maybe their relationship was a bit strange, but the most important proof that two humans were in a relationship was kissing, and that was one of the very few off-limit things. So clearly, they were just very good friends.

Very, very good friends, who eventually began to forgo wearing clothing around each other.

It started with Rose, as it always did. She’d sent him to the library to set up their stuff, and when she came to join him, she was in pajamas. Just pajama bottoms and a camisole, and she didn’t find anything strange about climbing into her usual spot and continuing her landscape sketch of the vibrant jungle they’d visited a few days before. With so few layers, Rose felt even more molded to the Doctor’s side, and he decided he liked it. She did it again the next night, and so the night after that, the Doctor did it himself.

His usually wore much less to bed than Rose. He never bothered with a shirt, and just slept in a pair of soft sweats. As he’d guessed, Rose didn’t even seem to notice. He did though. Cuddling with Rose while not wearing a shirt felt like it should have crossed a line, but taking his cues from Rose hadn’t let him astray yet, and if she was okay with it then so was the Doctor.

The lack of clothes bled into their everyday life. If they weren’t planning a trip for the day, neither of them bothered getting out of their pajamas in the first place. Rose took to laying with her head on his stomach while he worked under the console. Rose suggested a pillow beneath his back to stop him from hurting himself on the grate, and he didn’t have the heart to remind her his skin worked differently, so he just did it. It was a bit more comfortable, but nothing compared to having Rose’s hair tickling his chest.

It was during one of those sessions that Rose began to run her fingers over the Doctor’s skin. It’d almost tickled, but the Doctor didn’t want to scare her off, so he held in his twitches and just smiled at her before going back to work. It became a new part of their routine. Anytime the Doctor went shirtless, and sometimes even when he didn’t, Rose’s hands would wander as they cuddled or relaxed with each other. It was nice and soothing, and it lulled the Doctor to sleep before Rose a few times.  
Sometimes they forgot to turn it off when they left the Tardis. They both knew it was a different world out there, and none more different than when they visited Rose’s home. It was another unspoken thing, as so much of what they knew about each other was. When they were outside the Tardis, they kept a little more distance between them. Holding hands was okay, hugging was great, but the Doctor refrained from putting his arm around Rose’s shoulders as they walked together, or sat next to each other on the couch while Jackie forced them to watch telly with her. There was to be no cuddling, no wandering fingers, nothing that suggested a relationship. But sometimes they forgot. 

The Doctor received quite a few dirty looks just from walking around holding Rose’s hand, but a few of the patrons of the chip shop he’d taken her to looked absolutely scandalized when he slipped his arm around her waist without thinking. He’d quickly removed it, and Rose hadn’t even noticed, or if she did she was gracious enough not to tease him about it. They’d almost been caught out by Jackie as well, when she’d disappeared into the kitchen to make tea, and Rose’s hand found its way under the Doctor’s shirt and onto his chest. He knew she liked feeling his double heartbeat, but he’d had to whisper in her ear and warn her of her mother’s arrival.

She hadn’t even looked guilty, just hummed and pulled her hand back out to rest on her thigh. It hadn’t stopped her from resting her head on his shoulder, but the Doctor didn’t think that was too far until Jackie stared at them from the doorway. He couldn’t exactly explain their situation to her, and Rose didn’t look like she planned to move anytime soon, so he simply looked back at Jackie and gave her an innocent smile. She scowled a little, but that was the end of it, and she just went back to her seat with her mug.

He paid very close attention to Rose once Jack came on board. The Doctor didn’t know if Rose intended to develop anything with Jack, but that left him slightly confused about his relationship with her, and he focused on every cue she gave him. It turned out she didn’t expect anything to change. That very first night they danced together and Rose had no problem resting her forehead on his shoulder in plain view of the Captain.

Jack had teased, but Rose paid no mind, so the Doctor tried not to as well. It was harder to do that, as sometimes Jack went a little too far and all the Doctor wanted to do was shout at him. Rose had had it right though. After ignoring Jack’s comments for a couple days, Jack just stopped. Things were much more relaxed with the three of them, and Doctor found it was nice to be able to be with Rose like normal around another person. It eased the guilt he sometimes felt about pretending they weren’t close in public.

Everything continue as normal, and Jack was clearly happy about the lack of clothing required on the ship. They became so used to having him around, they started joining in with his teasing. It was a very good day when Rose and the Doctor could make Jack blush instead of the other way around. He never joined their cuddling, but he seemed content to relax in an armchair the Doctor had forgotten even existed. He never sat alone in the library, unless he was waiting for Rose to join him. They passed a lot of nights doing their own things in the library, or watching movies in the cinema.

Things got weird for the first time, when they went back to visit Mickey. The man had always rubbed the Doctor the wrong way, and he knew exactly why. Mickey was the only other person the Doctor had seen Rose being as close to, as with him. He couldn’t help it, he was jealous. But since he and Rose never actually discussed any of what they meant to each other, or at least what their touching meant, he didn’t have any right to complain. Jack seemed to be on his side, and the Doctor could see there was a hint of caution whenever Jack spoke to Mickey, especially after seeing them hug.

After all their time with Jack, Rose and the Doctor had even more trouble controlling themselves in public. Jack made it all feel so normal, like they had a right to be close to each other. And the Doctor had to admit, it helped his nerves a lot when Rose continued to hang on him in Cardiff.

After everything with Blon Fel-Fotch Passameer-Day Slitheen, the Doctor was shaken. They spent the night on the Tardis, rather than taking Blon’s egg straight back to  Raxacoricofallapatorious. After the day he’d had, the Doctor just wanted something normal. Jack disappeared into his room right away, but the Doctor headed to the library after getting ready for bed. 

For a Time Lord, he’d never spent much very much time in his library before Rose appeared. There were so many other rooms he used instead. He had a study that was now buried away at the back of the ship, a lab he never bothered going to anymore, a tinkering room filled to the brim with parts and items he’d pulled to pieces. He’d spent so much time reading at the Academy, that it stopped being fun. But when Rose came onboard, she thought him having a library was the height of what his Tardis could do. Even after he tried to explain, it was her favourite room, especially after she found the magazines the Tardis regularly updated. She didn’t like to be alone in there though, and spending so much time reading novels and being with Rose meant the Doctor had come to love the room again.

Rose took so long, the Doctor almost worried she wouldn’t come. Snippets of his fears and annoyances from the past 24 hours buzzed in his head as he lay tense on the couch in his usual position. Rose had left the Tardis with Mickey, even after seeming to make it so clear she still wanted the Doctor. Then she’d come running back, only to be held captive and strangled by Blon and there wasn’t a thing he could do to help her. Was she angry at him?

Finally Rose appeared. She’d showered, and then taken the time to blow-dry her hair. No wonder it took so long. Rose knew how much it tickled him to have her wet hair on his chest when she inevitably fell asleep on him. She was being considerate.

She crawled into her space with ease, but slid her sketchpad off his stomach in favour of putting her head there instead. In return, the Doctor closed the book he’d been staring through as he waited, and he put it on the end table. They lay together in silence, before the Doctor tried something new. He refused to be nervous about it, after all Rose had been doing it for a while now, so where was the harm? Anything Rose had done was okay for the Doctor to do, right?

Starting slowly, the Doctor ran his hand through Rose’s hair, and followed its path down to her neck. With gentle fingers he stroked the skin around her neck and shoulders, even sliding his pointer under the strap of her camisole to reach the thin line of skin hidden from him. He made wide brushes across the exposed skin of her upper back, and that was about all he could reach, so he just kept at it. After a few moments Rose shifted, and the Doctor froze. They didn’t move, when trying new things. That was how they let each other know what they were doing was okay. If Rose was moving, she must not want him to continue.

But she just scooted upward, and rested her head on his shoulder instead, giving him more access to her back. He waited a few tense moments, too surprised to start again in case that wasn’t what she wanted. As though wanting to reassure him, Rose began to touch him too. Long strokes up and down his stomach like she normally did to put him to sleep. So he tried again, this time sneaking his hand under her shirt so he could reach all of her back, and her sides.

They lay together for a while, and the Doctor relaxed. Just a new routine, another level of their friendship. Though it felt less like friendship when Rose’s finger dipped past his waistband and stroked his hipbones and abdomen. Still, he didn’t move, didn’t even let himself tense up. It was new, but not bad. Far from it, the touches were extremely nice. Normally he waited until Rose had done something new a few times to reciprocate, but he was very curious about the direction they were heading. After just a few moments he pressed the pad of his middle finger just under the edge of her pajama bottoms, just enough to touch her own hipbone. When she didn’t move, he pushed the rest of his fingers under and just held her hip, stroking softly in place.

The two of them fell asleep like that, with each others hands stuck under their waistbands and holding each other’s hips. It was grounding, comforting, and just a little more than what the Doctor knew friendships were supposed to have. It made him feel warm and glowy that Rose wanted to do anything  _ more _ with him. He hoped they could keep doing it, add it to their usual behaviour like so many other things he liked.

They didn’t get the chance. After dropping off Blon at a nursery, they went to Kyoto and nearly got involved in the Battle of Tatarahama, escaping just barely. Then the Bad Wolf came. He knew what had to be done, and it was his last chance to show her just how much  _ more _ he wanted. So he pulled the time vortex out of Rose, and he kissed her. It was the line they never crossed, the one that very clearly said they were in a relationship. But that was what he wanted. They’d been getting so close, and he knew he’d never be satisfied with just pretending they weren’t anything when they visited Rose’s family or went anywhere public.

It hurt that she didn’t remember, and it hurt to see the fear on her face when he told her to stay away. He didn’t think he’d ever told her not to touch him before. But he got her to smile, and that was the last thing he saw before he regenerated. Oh how he hoped she would like his new body, that she would stay with him. That they could walk down the street without worrying about what anyone else thought of his daft old face. He kept that in mind as he changed, and right off the bat he knew something had improved. He had new teeth.


	2. Ten

After the Doctor’s regeneration, everything between him and Rose flip flopped. Before, he took all his signals about touch from her. He knew what was okay and what wasn’t based on how she behaved. He followed her lead. Now, in his new body, Rose was following him. It was like someone had rewound the tape on their relationship. Rose only touched him in ways that he touched her. Starting with the hand holding, then standing close, then hugging.

He felt very nervous, but he knew what Rose  _ had _ been okay with, so he tried to emulate it. She didn’t even come to the library that first night on the Tardis together, so he knew she didn’t want to start where they’d left off. He went back to the beginning. The next day, as Rose peered into the screen on the console and tried to understand some of the Gallifreyan he’d been teaching her, he leaned against her and watched over her shoulder, as casually as he could. She let him, and then the Doctor knew he was doing the right thing. 

Step by step, he worked his way back up with her. He fought through the slips of loneliness and confusion that plagued him each time he realized he couldn’t do something with her because they hadn’t reached that point yet. The kiss on New Earth had been alarming, and as soon as Rose had looked nervous afterwards, he knew something was wrong. That wasn’t what they did. They didn’t jump like that and they certainly didn’t run away afterward.

The Doctor tried to be patient. He knew it had to be a shock for Rose, that he had a different body. But he couldn’t help trying to skip a couple tiny steps, in an attempt to get back to the way they used to be. The night he’d shown up in the library in his same sleep sweats, Rose had actually jumped. He worried he’d gone too far, but she quickly composed herself and seemed content to wrap around him like normal.

They’d only just gotten back to pre-regeneration levels of closeness and touching, when they went back to help Mickey at the school he was investigating. It didn’t end well, and Rose was angry with him, and then he stupidly invited Mickey on board. The only saving grace was that Mickey didn’t know about their library routine, and he went straight to check out his new room and go to bed. For the first time since they’d met, the Doctor was nervous about holding Rose on the Tardis. So nervous in fact, that he put on a plain shirt when he got into his pajamas. Rose noticed the difference straight away, he could see her pause as she entered the library. She too, had switched to a more covering shirt.

That night, the picture she drew was of K-9, and the Doctor accepted it as a gift quietly. He didn’t know what to say, so he didn’t say anything. Rose did. “I thought, I thought I was different.” she whispered. There was no malice, just innocent confusion. Impulsively, the Doctor planted his free hand on Rose’s waist, under her shirt. Again, he’d skipped a few steps, but he didn’t remove it when Rose jumped.

“You are different. Much different. Every companion I’ve had was unique, but you, Rose...you’re on a whole different scale. I meant what I said, I’m not going to leave you behind.” She needed to know, needed to understand how he felt and how she couldn’t possibly compare herself to the others he’d traveled with. 

At his words, Rose hummed and snuggled a little closer. After a moment, she reached up his shirt and rested her palm on the center of his chest. “Your heartbeat is the same.” she mumbled. Apparently whatever worry he had been causing was keeping her awake, and with it abated she was ready to sleep.

“I’m the same, Rose. I promise.” He dropped his book onto the floor next to the couch, and ran his fingers through her hair. He’d missed her, missed this. Finally, it felt like they were where they should be.

Things fell apart the next morning. Mickey found them, asleep on the couch. Unlike Jack, who’d had the sense to just leave them be and save his teasing for when they were fully awake and ready to retaliate, Mickey woke them up with his shout. “Ha! I knew it! You two’ve been shagging. How long has this been going on?”

The Doctor was awake instantly, but Rose took a moment to shake herself. When she realized she was still mostly laying on the Doctor she climbed off of him. She looked embarrassed. Of him. Of them. 

“Mickey, we aren’t together, it’s not what you think-I just fell asleep.” Rose was always grumpy in the morning, but such a harsh awakening had kindled flames in her eyes. “And besides, what room do you have to judge, you and Trisha Delaney?”

Mickey walked out, and Rose followed him, leaving the Doctor laying on the couch. He could hear them shouting down the hall, and then two doors slammed in rapid succession. It was not going to be a good day.

Reinette had been a mistake, the Doctor knew that. He’d just been so angry and frustrated, it wasn’t her fault. Even though both Mickey and Rose seemed to have calmed down once they were ready for a trip, Rose hadn’t gone near him. There was so much space between them, and she kept clinging to Mickey. The Doctor’d thought, after Cardiff, that he’d gotten over his jealousy of Mickey. There it was though. 

Then Reinette had kissed him, and as the Doctor well knew, kissing implied more than friendship. She’d only just met him and she wanted something more. At least he was good enough for her.

But it’d infuriated Rose. Even after everything was fixed and all was said and done, her hug when he got back to her was tense. This was something he didn’t know how to fix, at all. He lost Reinette, and Rose and Mickey had left him alone in the control room. He hadn’t wanted to be alone. He’d wanted Rose to hold his hand, and he wanted them to talk it out and then go to sleep. 

He spent most nights on the library couch. He and Rose had used it so often that the Tardis switched it out for a copy that was much wider, much more cushioned. It was basically a bed with arms and a very long headboard. But now, Rose didn’t join him. The whole time Mickey was with them, the Doctor slept alone on the couch. He didn’t even like his own bed anymore.

They argued, after Mickey chose to stay behind in the parallel universe. As immensely relieved as he was when for the first time in weeks Rose appeared at the library door in her pajamas, it made the Doctor feel cheap. Even though he knew Rose must have been hurting, he snarked at her anyway, “Now that you’re boyfriend’s gone, you can stand be around me again?”

Rose flinched, “What d’you mean stand to be around you? I’m around you all the time.” But she knew what he meant. She couldn’t even look him in the eye.   
“I don’t know Rose, what do I mean? Could I be referring to the fact that you’ve avoided this room like the plague since Mickey showed up? Or maybe I’m talking about your refusal to stand within two feet of me whenever he’s around? The list goes on if I’m honest, and since whatever it is we have is so clearly shameful, I don’t know why you even bother sticking around at all.” The words felt like venom seeping from him, but the Doctor was halfway to the point of not caring. Too many nights wondering what he’d done wrong, why Rose hadn’t picked him, how he could be better. Analyzing everything that was wrong with him that he’d been pushing away since Rose starting making him feel like a real person again.

His outburst had pushed him to stand up, and Rose walked up to face him properly, “You know why I stayed away Doctor. That’s what we do. When we’re in public we don’t do the things we normally do. Mickey is public. We agreed on this ages ago, I don’t see why you’re so upset now.”

“But why?” The Doctor’s voice broke, and he couldn’t believe his eyes were burning. He took a step back and crossed his arms over the full jumper he’d taken to wearing to sleep. When he’d first started wearing it he’d hoped it would remind Rose of his last body. She hadn’t ever seen it. “You decided. You made all the rules, and I never questioned them, but now I am. Why was it so awful for you to be near me in public? What is so wrong with what we do that you can’t stand to have people see it? And as far as Mickey being public, you didn’t have any problems when Jack was around! So clearly Mickey is something special and I’m not.” 

The Doctor waited for an answer, and when none came, he looked down at his socked feet. Feeling very small, he repeated Rose’s words back to her. “I thought I was different.”

He didn’t know what he expected as a response. He felt like...like a human. Nattering on about his feelings and how she’d hurt him and how as idiotic as it was he’d come to rely on Rose. During the war he’d lost any appreciation for touch or closeness, or caring about things any more than skin deep. From the moment he’d met Rose, she’d brought it all back. She cared about everyone, and everything, and was always so insistent that touch would fix things. A hug, or a hand to hold, or just being someone people could lean on and cry to. Rose made him feel like those things were important, and they certainly were for him.

She was his lifeline, and he thought she knew it. He thought she understood how important her touch was to him, how important her whole being was to him. He thought she felt the same.

The air gushed out of him as Rose jumped into him. On instinct he wrapped his arms around her waist and held her up, and she hugged him as tightly as they normally did after a near death experience. After a moment, she leaned back, still hanging from him. “I’m sorry. You are different.” He couldn’t believe that, but she insisted, “Really though, you are. An’ I know it’s stupid, but that’s the whole reason I didn’t want to show anyone. I wanted to keep this all to myself, because as soon as anyone else knew about it I’d have to deal with the consequences.”

Finally Rose wiggled down to the ground, only to pull the Doctor onto the couch next to her. He couldn’t stop staring, could barely believe what he was hearing. Rose had gone shy, and she tugged on the cuff of the Doctor’s jumper as she continued. “I like what we-I like how we don’t question anythin’. How you and me, we just are, and we don’t have to do labels or wonder what’s okay. We just do it, and it just works. I don’t want to deal with the questions that everyone’d be asking us if we were to be...together.”

The Doctor tried to speak, but she looked up and cut him off, still not done explaining. “But I do though, want to be, you know. If you do. And I know I shouldn’t have been so awful to you, just cus’ I was scared to talk to Mickey about it. I’ll tell anyone you like though, I promise. That is, if you actually want...this.”

Rose was close to him again, and she was offering him everything he ever wanted, and normally that would be when he started running his stupid gob. But words escaped him, and he just nodded, a smile threatening to split his face in two. Rose got one to match, and then the Doctor did what was natural. The off-limits thing that didn’t seem so off-limits now.

He leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers. He had to admit, it was much nicer when she wasn’t pouring excruciating pain into his body in the form of the time vortex. It was also much nicer when she kissed back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, there you go. A relatively short fanfic, with a T & Up rating. That was way harder to do than I thought it would be.  
> As always, I could not be sated with just the T rating. If you continue to read the next installment, there's a little bit of an epilogue, with a nice Explicit Rating. What can I say? I've got a problem.

**Author's Note:**

> What do you think? I'm trying really hard to create something less than 20k words long. I don't normally write short stories, so this short of a chapter is actually an accomplishment for me.


End file.
